question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
