Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
