CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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