I wanna passion pit in your ass
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
