I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
