actually, I'm a sock model
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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