Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
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