My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
