We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize