I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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