I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
