bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
