I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
