the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
