did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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