the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
