now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
be right there i have to get my cape
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Randomize
