Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
