belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I can text with my tongue
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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