I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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