is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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