Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
