i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
PANTIES FOUND
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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