i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize
