Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
i need some magic done to my vagina
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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