i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
