I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
