fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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