how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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