dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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