have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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