i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
