so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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