You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
