Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
why do cheetos always look like penises
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
