I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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