I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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