Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
