let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
