i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
