The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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