Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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