What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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