she looked like the bat from fern gully.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
