you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
