in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
you would pick up someone in the library
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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