2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
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