Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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