Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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