It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
