I want to make a zoo with you.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize