apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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